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It's certainly not unreasonable to want to ensure that one's pets are well-provided for.

But an obsession with one's pets can be legally considered "unreasonable behaviour" and therefore grounds for divorce in Singapore, a family court decided.

This was part of a judgment on a case where a couple, who had no children, disagreed over whether the wife had behaved unreasonably, CNA reported.

Currently, divorce law in Singapore recognises unreasonable behaviour as one of four reasons to apply for divorce, with the other three being adultery, desertion, or separation.

The man, who started divorce proceedings in July 2020, sought to prove that his wife's behaviour had been unreasonable. They had stopped living together as a couple since 2013.

He cited five aspects of such behaviour:

1. Her obsession with her pet dogs, which she referred to as "the kids",
2. Her issues with anger management and unreasonable demands,
3. Her refusal to be financially independent or look for a job,
4. Her compulsive hoarding, and
5. Her refusal to let her husband move on.

In support of his case, the man produced evidence in the form of 300 pages of text messages exchanged between the couple, over the course of around two years before he commenced the proceedings.

At this point in time, the couple had been living apart, after the husband moved back to his parents' home.

"My kids are ill"

In one text, the woman, referring to her pet dogs as "kids", told the husband: "My kids are ill. Please help them on Sunday."

When the husband said he was not free that day, the wife replied, "I have to see to doggie. Make time for kids on Sunday."

The man then repeated that he was not free, but the woman texted: "You will have to make time, the kids need you. I have to see to doggie. He's not doing well."

Although he maintained that he had no time, the wife continued to text him instructions regarding the dogs.

"Will arrange taxi"

Another exchange, which took place in August 2019, involved the wife trying to get the husband to take one of her dogs for an injection, and him refusing, saying he was not free.

CNA captured a portion of this exchange as follows:

Woman: "You will have to take him in for injection."

Woman: "Be responsible and bring him in".

Man: "I said NO and I am not going to repeat myself. You can ask your sisters or nephews or nieces or whoever to help you."

Woman: "I have been battling termites and handling kids I am tired please be practical and bring doggie in for his injection".

The man continued to reject her request, but she texted him again the next day, saying:

"Benji is standing at gate waiting for his walk"

"Benji has been waiting for you and taxi will be here soon"

"Trust you will be here to take doggie don't let him down"

The man said:

"I said I am not free and yet you insist on making the arrangements. You are so used to bullying me. I say this for one last time. I am not free."

To which the woman replied: "Doggie needs you. What bully nonsense."

Some time after that exchange, she texted him saying she needed food:

"Need Pizza hut sweet potato crust Hawaiian + cold drink"

"need food"

"I need food"

"I need food"

The man eventually ordered her food via delivery.

Husband delayed divorce proceedings as dogs were ill

CNA also reported that the husband contacted lawyers about divorce in 2017, but did not proceed to file for divorce at that time as the dogs were ill, affecting the wife's emotional state.

Three of her dogs were diagnosed with terminal conditions in 2017, 2018, and 2019.

The man wanted to give his wife time to get over her loss, and thus only began divorce proceedings in July 2020.

Wife denies her behaviour was unreasonable

While the husband started divorce proceedings on the grounds that his wife's behaviour was unreasonable, she denied this, saying the marriage had not broken down irretrievably.

She said they still followed their usual routine, and continued to associate with each other as husband and wife even though they lived apart.

She claimed that her husband continued to care for her and the pets, paying for expenses.

The woman was reportedly a practising lawyer previously, though she refused to return to work, instead relying on the husband for money.

She produced vet records, text messages as evidence of him buying her food without her asking for it, and offered her passport as evidence that he indulged her desire to travel.

Court judgment

The judge in the case disagreed that the pair had continued to associate with each other as a married couple after the man moved out, drawing attention to the fact that they ceased sexual relations sometime in 2015, and noting that the woman noticed her husband's behaviour changing in late 2018.

As for the woman's point that her husband had paid for food and her expenses, the judge disagreed that he did this because he considered himself her husband. Instead, this was done out of pity, the judge found.

It was also decided that the man had proven his case that the wife was overly concerned about the dogs and how to care for them.

She had once refused to leave the house for around three months, and did not wash her hair, because she did not want the dogs to be unsupervised.

Unreasonable demands placed on husband

The judge found that she made unreasonable demands of him such as asking him to take leave to attend to the dogs.

She would also threaten suicide if he refused her requests.

As for the part of the husband's case arguing that the wife was a compulsive hoarder, the judge did not find that he had proved it, but noted that her living habits made things difficult for him, such as keeping items on their bed while they were still living together.

She did not allow him to throw them away, and the pair had to sleep on the floor.

The judge concluded her judgment saying that "the evidence overwhelmingly pointed to an unhappy pair that had been unable to live as husband and wife for many years."

She also ordered the wife to pay S$8,500 for the husband's legal costs.

Top image via Sandy Millar on Unsplash