5 original and different ideas for the next inevitable edition of Ah Boys To Men
Confirm break box office records again.
It is with a heavy heart to report that Singaporeans will have to endure the Ah Boys and those darn product placements again.
The doyen of product-placing, record-breaking, one-part-too-long local films Jack Neo will add another film to his money-making machinery that is the Ah Boys To Men franchise.
After learning that Ah Boys To Men 3: Frogmen raked in some $2.83 million, making it the best ever opening weekend total for an Asian film in Singapore, he told The Straits Times Life:
“There is the possibility that I’ll make another one, but only if we can come up with a good script and one that is different from the others.”
It’s funny that he mentioned about a good script that is different, especially when Part 3 is essentially the same set of actors, reprising the same roles albeit in a different unit.
Well, that’s fine. Money is the best currency.
Since director Neo is looking for a different script, here are a few suggestions from us. On the house, bro.
1. Ah Boys to Men: The Red Berets
The Ah Boys wake up, realising that their Naval Diving Unit training is just a very bad dream. But before anyone can say “Hooyah!”, their bunk doors slam against the wall. In steps Sergeant Ong, who is wearing a red headdress, with a matching Ranger tab on his uniform. He barked: “Blardy hell, what time already? Are you ready for your 72km route march and combat jump?”
Pros: Same premise as the previous editions. Good chance to flash some abs. Elite forces. #jinsatki
2. Ah Boys to Men: The Armskote Days
The Ah Boys wake up, realising that their Commando training is just a very bad dream. But before anyone can say “For Honour and Glory!”, their bunk doors slam against the wall. In steps Sergeant Ong, who barks: “I need some featherlight (actually flannelette) and volunteers to clean the armskote!”
Pros: Same premise as the previous editions. Ah Boys can book out in one piece albeit with oily, sooty fingers.
3. Ah Boys to Men: Clerks rule the SAF
The Ah Boys wake up in an aircon room, realising that being stuck in a stale room full of weapons is just a very bad dream. But before anyone can say “Draw arms!”, someone knocks on the glass window. In steps Sergeant Ong, who with a courteous tone that is incongruent with his usual self says: “Bro, sorry I’m late for RT. Can still help me in pro? Please?”
4. Ah Men to Boys: The Volunteer Corps
The Ah Boys, finally men, are sick of their corporate life and beer belly. Facing with a midlife crisis, they reunite once more for a last hurrah: The SAF Volunteer Corps.
Pros: Helps with Volunteer Corps recruitment drive. Jack Neo can star in this show, which will bring down costs.
5. Ah Girls to Women: The Fairer Sex Strikes Back
The Ah Girls wake up, realising that they are women after all and all those stuff about being sweaty, obnoxious men are just a bad dream. But before anyone can say “Want to go spec mess?”, their bunk doors slam against the wall. In steps Sergeant Ong, who barks: “All you gu niangs, what time already? Fall in now.”
Pros: Can finally use gu niang legitimately. Can repeat the entire franchise again. But no more CB leaf jokes.
Our Ah Boys to Men 3 review
Top photo from Mindef.