Singapore's ruling People's Action Party will be having their biennial convention at Kallang Theatre this Sunday.

The theme of this year's convention is "Our New Way Forward: A Call to Action".

Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong, who is the PAP Secretary General; Second Minister for Defence Chan Chun Sing, the party's Organising Secretary; and five activists will be speaking.

Whether you are an aspiring PAP politician or a virgin PAP convention attendee, below are the house rules -- when followed to a T -- will endear you to your comrades:

Dos

1. Kee Qiu when Minister Chan Chun Sing speaks.

2. Keep a straight face during the long speeches.

No matter how strong the urge to do something else, just don't.

3. Throw your hands in the air and pump your fists.

4. Give a wide smile when MP Baey Yam Keng is near.

Source

Nothing can be cooler than taking a selfie with the man himself.

5. Clap

The trick is to wait for the opportune moment and be the one who initiates the round of applause. This shows that you are paying attention.

Positive example: Use the Inflatable Clapper Sticks to enhance your applause. 

Source

Don'ts

1. Mention "Aljunied", unless you are a potential PAP candidate there. 

Source: Youtube

Victor Lye, chairman of the Bedok Reservoir-Punggol PAP branch in Aljunied GRC, said at the PAP 2012 Conference: "In Aljunied, we must be prepared to argue for policies – even if it is different from the government or even similar to the opposition."

Huh?

2. Wear blue

Source

Obviously, one shouldn't show up in Workers' Party baby blue.

Neither should anyone wear the People's Association blue shirt because that would politicise a quasi-political organisation into a fully political one.

Negative example: Two blue hummingbirds in the sea of white.

3. Don't ask if anyone enjoys reading blogs and alternative news sites.

Source

"Hey, I read Alex Au's Yawning Bread blog that day. What he say about government, quite true, right?"

4. Don't start an anecdote you cannot finish respectfully.

Source: RedSports.sg

For example: "I was in town the other day and I bumped into Michael Palmer..."

5. Try reassuring everybody it is okay to lose East Coast GRC in the next election.

Source

"It's okay, because PAP still controls the west side of Singapore."

Top photo from here

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