Singapore's very impressive netball team beat the Philippines 84 - 12 yesterday (June 3, 2015), cruising into the semis in the process.

This piece of jubilant news was, however, overshadowed by this headline that offended the sensibilities of many netizens moonlighting as wordsmiths.

The offending headline.

The Internet went crazy with the improper usage of the word 'thrash'. The audacity!

Perhaps they reacted the way they did because of this Straits Times article with zero photos, likes and shares.

Both matches were held today with roughly similar score lines but yet 'beat' was used for the Malaysia match.

We investigate further.

With this, we believe that The Straits Times house style dictate that their reporters can only use the word 'thrash' if the margin of the win is at least 72 points or more.

112 - 11.

Now, that was a proper thrashing right there. And no one can accuse the national daily of being a Team Singapore bootlicker hyping up Team Singapore's performance.

Anyway, here are ten different ways Mothership.sg would attempt to rewrite the headline.

1. Singapore netballers score 72 more points than Philippines to reach semis.

The Internet's math wizards will be offended though.

2. Singapore beat Philippines 84-12 in netball; won with a bigger margin as compared to bitter rivals Malaysia.

One does not pass up on a chance to poke our neighbours.

3. Singapore netballers happen to win Philippines 84 - 12 to reach semis.

Very by the way. Very moving-on type of news.