At 20, Nur Ariffin Bin Nordin is quietly confident.
The mild-mannered student professes to enjoy anime, gaming, and writing song lyrics. He's passionate about social media and creates content for YouTube and Twitch.
There's a lingering teenage awkwardness, and it takes some prompting before he opens up, but he seems generally content with life.
He wasn't always like that though; as a child, Ariffin had a tough home life.
"There were a lot of arguments and fights [at home]. My parents were probably too busy to look after us...and they are divorced, so it's even harder for them to look after the kids," he said.
As the middle child, with two older siblings and one younger sibling, Ariffin struggled with parents who seemed to spend all their time working.
He eventually developed anger issues and would get easily agitated, although you'd never guess it from how composed he seems now.
"Being with my family was not really fun," he explained, when I ask about his upbringing.
"It was quite chaotic, quite stressful."
Trying something new
When he was around seven years old, his family was approached by a charity: Life Community, which serves children and families from low-income and vulnerable backgrounds.
"They walked into our house and talked to us about the programme. And my family decided to sign me up," he recalled.
"Since then, I'd go for their events, each time there was something on for the community."
The charity would hold regular events like workshops, movie outings, or games and activities.
Photo from Life Community/Facebook
When he was in Primary 5, the charity even found a free tuition teacher to help with his academics, Ariffin shared.
Not only did his grades start to improve, being part of the community also helped with his emotional and mental health.
Because of his anger issues during his teenage years, he would get easily annoyed by the slightest of issues and even turn violent whenever he was angry.
During moments of anger or sadness, he recounted how a "a certain sentence (would come) to my head and I didn't know what to do with it".
It was at a Life Community event where he learnt to put those negative emotions — and the subsequent words that would form in his mind — to paper to form lyrics and songs.
This helped him discover his passion for lyric writing, and also taught him a new way to manage his emotions.
"Being in the community helped me distract myself from this whole situation, and helped make me happier and find a way to cope with stuff."
Photo by Mothership
Friends and mentors
Apart from learning new skills, like leadership and emceeing, being a member of this community helped him form friendships and receive mentorship from older adults.
Over the years, there was Geraldine, Uncle Reuben and Michelle — all valuable mentors who have been Ariffin's trusted older friends and cheerleaders.
Not only did these mentors teach him how to avoid getting agitated, they would also help him deal with his anger whenever he had an episode.
"My mentor would pull or put me aside to calm me down by making me do breathing exercises, drinking water and so on," he recalled.
Despite their busy schedule, they'd also make time to visit him at his home and catch up.
"They'd sometimes bring [me] out for outings and all that," he added.
Giving back to the community
It was these mentors that inspired Ariffin to continue being involved in Life Community.
Even after "graduating" from the programme at the end of secondary school, Ariffin remains very much connected to the Life Community ecosystem.
"I don't spend much time with my family as they are quite busy. So I often spent time with the people I met there, the friends I made.
And I was able to cherish the friendships and continue them, even after I graduated from Life Community."
He has also volunteered as an emcee at a few community events — something which he evidently enjoys and is passionate about.
Photo from Life Community/Facebook
Just last December, Ariffin was one of the emcees for a Christmas carnival event. When asked if he was nervous about having to be on stage, he only shrugged nonchalantly — it was not his first time, we were told.
Donning sparkly top hats in line with the festive spirit, he and another volunteer Min Chuen confidently took the audience through the programme for the evening.
This event, which saw some awards being given out to Life Community beneficiaries, stands out as being especially meaningful for Ariffin.
"When you see the prizes that the kids win, you can see that they value the stuff," he explained.
Photo from Life Community/Facebook
One of the awards given out during that event include the Mothership Bursary, an award that financially supports students aged 13-19 who have displayed academic improvement within this year. The award was created in collaboration with Life Community as part of Mothership's 10th anniversary.
In December, 26 students were presented with the award: 21 students each took home S$250, while the top five were each awarded S$500.
The recipients are students who, like Ariffin, participate in various programmes offered by Life Community.
But beyond tangible gifts and prizes, Ariffin sees how such events are able to bring loved ones closer together for a few precious hours.
"During events where they can bring their family, it helps them to bond with their family, get closer to their family...unlike some people who hardly talk to each other on a day-to-day basis."
Photo from Life Community/Facebook
What's next for Ariffin?
He tells us he's currently enrolled in the Institute of Technical Education (ITE), but he hopes to continue contributing to Life Community's events wherever he can.
He recently signed up to be a mentor, and while he has not began mentoring yet, he's eager to start. It's how he hopes to help other youths who struggled like he did, he explains.
"Even if my schedule is busy, I'll definitely try to find a way to come back to the event to help out, even if it's a last-minute thing. It's a way to give back for what they have done for me."
Top photo by Mothership & via Life Community/Facebook
Mothership has been around for 10 years already!?
Whoa, even we’re surprised.
But hey, we made it somehow. And it’s all thanks to you.
Saying thank you is not enough. For our anniversary, we’re giving back to young people in Singapore, through ways that we believe will be meaningful to the next generation.
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