June 18, 2023, 12:15 PM
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Watching Zheng Geping, 58, and his two kids trade playful punches in the Mothership studio on a weekday afternoon is an interesting sight.
Tay Ying, 27, and Calvert Tay, 23, are less than half their dad's age, but from the way they interact, you can tell that they've got a bond not quite like traditional Asian families.
Zheng, who popped by for a Father's Day interview, was surprised by his brood halfway through, tearing up at the sight of them.
"I see them at home all the time, but I know how busy they are. Them making time out to come here for me... I'm really touched," the thespian explains as he dabs away the last of his tears.
@nova.mothership Name something more wholesome than this 🥹❤️ #FathersDay #zhenggeping #parentsoftiktok #tiktoksg #father ♬ love nwantinti (ah ah ah)
It's clear how close they are, as both kids tell us about how their dad has to have his kopi-o kosong every morning, but treats himself to kaya toast and soft-boiled eggs ("yolk whole, never beaten, because that's his pet peeve") whenever their mum Hong Huifang has time to go out for breakfast with them.
Zheng laughs about how Tay Ying gets emotional when listening to Blackpink songs, scrunching his face dramatically to show how emotionally invested she is in their music.
In return, she talks about how her brother and dad's dancing looks more like a martial arts routine.
"I've always wanted my kids to treat me like a friend," Zheng told us at the start of the interview.
Whatever he’s been doing appears to have worked.
Tough love
Growing up, Zheng didn't have this sort of relationship with his late father.
He muses:
"My dad was the typical Asian father. He'd never say 'I love you', but I could feel how much he loved through his actions.
There was one time I injured myself while filming an action scene. I was married with kids by then, but my dad chided me while rubbing medicine on my injuries. Although his words were biting, I could feel how much his heart ached and his love for me through his hands, which were trembling slightly."
It was because he was brought up with this sort of tough love that Zheng told himself he wanted to be a different type of dad.
The new-age dad
Zheng proudly shares with us that he tells his wife and kids "I love you" daily, and showers them with hugs and kisses too.
When they were teens, he sat them down and spoke to them about LGBQT+ issues.
Zheng explains:
"I talked to them about relationships in general, and I also told them that people have different sexual orientations. I assured them that I would be okay regardless, and there's no right or wrong when it comes to this. It's just the way we were born, and a part of us."
He's a dad who hopes his children confide in him, and know that they can talk to him about just about anything.
That isn't to say that Zheng gives his kids complete free rein.
"Sometimes, I'll tell them 'We're going to have a meeting tonight', and they know something is up and we'll be sitting down to have a long talk about something they did," he says.
"I want to make sure they do the right thing, but I believe in reasoning with them rather than ordering them to do whatever I want."
Despite the loving environment they grew up in, both Tay Ying and Calvert went through a rebellious phase — something Zheng refers to as "them looking for their place in the world and direction in life".
Questions like "Darling, how was your day?" would be met with a gruff "Go away lah."
Instead of getting angry, Zheng left them to their own devices and they'd eventually come up to him to apologise.
"Once you close the door on them, you're finished," he reasons. "If you give them space, they'll come back to you because they know that they were wrong for being rude. Let them be. As long as they know that your door is open, they will come back to you."
All in the family
With the entire family in showbiz — Tay Ying is currently focusing on acting, while Calvert on singing — Zheng acknowledges that there are naysayers who will think that his kids are nepo babies (or if you're still stuck in 2000, you may refer to them as "celebrity kids who free-ride off their parents' fame").
"They might think what my children kelong, but what they don't realise is that people will judge [Tay Ying and Calvert] by how well they do," he explains. "In order for them to get casted, they still have to go through auditions. Sometimes, it may be harder for them to prove themselves because people expect more from them."
Hate comments, Zheng always tells his kids, can either be ignored or taken from a different perspective.
Constructive criticism can be taken into consideration, and he reminds them that they come from a good place. Comments born out of hatred, however, are better left ignored.
He ends with a wry chuckle, "Everyone gets salty from time to time, even us. That's just the way it is."
Top photo by Livia Soh & Lee Wei Lin
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