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Former Mediacorp actress Jacelyn Tay has shared her experience of how she recently handled a question posed by her son, Zavier Wong, on sex.
In a post put up on Instagram and Facebook on Jan. 3, Tay said that her son asked, "Does it really feel good when penis goes into vagina?'
She added that this was not the first time that she had taught him about sex, as she had previously taught him to "stay pure."
Unless you are married, there should be no touching or kissing a girl: Tay
Tay said that while it did indeed feel good when a penis went into a vagina, such a feeling should be strictly reserved for marriage.
She added:
"If u feel good with anyone for sexual pleasure, then there is something wrong with u. It’s like satisfying the body wrongly with drugs or liken to eating junk food full of chemicals that cause cravings to the brain."
Tay also issued a warning against what she saw as the danger of casual sex.
"For the wrong pleasure, casual sex might even destroy your health cos people who anyhow have sex with anyone are highly likely to get sexually transmitted viruses and diseases. Not only your physical body is contaminated, your soul & your spirit will contaminate too."
Zavier should therefore not touch or kiss a girl before marriage, as this can potentially lead to sex.
In addition, he should not engage in "dirty talks" about women's bodies, or believe other boys who will say that he is "not macho" for never having sex before.
"A pure mind"
Tay highlighted that her son also asked, "What to do if my penis stands and I feel like having sex?"
Here, Tay said that while she had initially told Zavier to control himself, she has concluded, upon reflection, that her son should not feel aroused at all, except towards the woman whom he will marry.
"Last night, God gave me a revelation in my sleep.
'A pure soul should not be aroused.'
Wow! God is saying when one’s mind is pure and healthy, we should not have sexual cravings except for our beloved married partner."
Tay also expressed her disapproval of masturbation as a solution to arousal, although she admitted that she was unclear if there was any other solutions.
Nevertheless, the key takeaway that she had to enforce on her son was: "Ok, a pure mind should not have reaction when he sees a sexy lady😅😅. I got to correct that. 🙏🏻"
Many followers approve of Tay's approach
Many of Tay's followers, including fellow celebrity Fann Wong, voiced their approval of what they saw as Tay's frank approach with her son, noting that it was tough to talk about sex with their children.
Source: Screenshot from Jacelyn Tay Instagram
Source: Screenshot from Jacelyn Tay Instagram
Source: Screenshot from Jacelyn Tay Facebook
Source: Screenshot from Jacelyn Tay Facebook
One follower questioned Tay's approach, however, noting that it was idealistic, as well as unrealistic to expect their children to not kiss others behind their backs as teenagers.
Source: Screenshot from Jacelyn Tay Facebook
In response, Tay said that she did not expect her child to achieve 100 per cent in what she had taught him and that there was still a chance of him engaging in sex.
However, such an approach is preferable to telling him that it is ok to kissing a little and not having sex, as it might cause him to be confused and be unclear about when to stop, she added.
In addition, she also has a "duty" to teach him the "moral standards" in life, although it is ultimately his responsibility as to whether he can do the right thing, she concluded.
Source: Screenshot from Jacelyn Tay Instagram
Tay, however, has since removed her posts.
Speaking to Mothership, Tay explained that she took down the post as she realised that the society is not ready to discuss such a topic yet.
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Top collage images via Jacelyn Tay's Instagram