S'pore dad, 47, reports himself to police for using excessive force to discipline special needs son, 15

Over the course of five years, a father, 47, used various means to discipline his two sons, one of whom has special needs but is high-functioning.

When he was upset at their behaviour, he would hit them, force them to kneel, or deny them meals.

He eventually reported himself to the police in March 2024, and his then-wife followed suit on the advice of a social worker.

The man pleaded guilty in court to three counts of ill-treating a child on Dec. 16.

Punishments

According to CNA, the court heard that the man and his ex-wife have two sons, aged 15 and 11.

The older son has special needs but is high-functioning.

The man cannot be named to protect the identities of the children.

In 2019, the family moved back to Singapore, having lived overseas since 2015.

Through the years since then, the father would employ punishments of increasing intensity to discipline his sons.

According to his ex-wife, such means included slapping and pinching the boys, making them kneel and denying them meals, CNA reported.

On one occasion in 2020, the man pinched his older son's chest over an incident, resulting in bruises.

In March that same year, the son's tuition teacher noticed the bruise, to which the boy, who was nine then, said that it was his father who caused it.

The teacher proceeded to take a photo.

In 2021, the man made his younger son take off his pants and face the wall after being angered by him.

He then forcefully hit his buttocks and legs multiple times with a cane, resulting in marks and abrasions.

The younger son was six years old then, according to CNA.

In early January 2024, the man grew angry at his elder son, then 13, for being rude and hit him multiple times.

He also threatened to hit the child with an object before his ex-wife intervened.

The boy was also made to kneel on the floor, and he sustained bruises and scratches.

Ex-wife moved out with sons after January 2024 incident

After this incident in January 2024, the ex-wife moved out with the two sons.

The man eventually lodged a police report against himself in March 2024 for using excessive violence when disciplining his older son.

In May 2024, his ex-wife acted on the advice of a social worker and similarly made a police report against the man, accusing him of family violence.

The prosecution sought 16 to 18 months' jail for the man, arguing that anger or frustration was "no excuse" to commit offences, CNA reported.

He further argued that the level of harm was significant, and that both boys sustained injuries that "were not minor".

In the man's defence, his lawyer said this was not a case of senseless or malicious violence, but that they occurred in the context of discipline.

According to the defence lawyer, the man had quit his career and moved overseas to support his elder son's condition, which is an indication of his devotion as a father and the sacrifices that he has made for his children.

The lawyer posited that offences involved "misguided discipline" and not "unprovoked aggression", according to CNA.

Adding context for the punishments

The lawyer provided some context to the man's offences.

When he pinched the elder son's chest, the boy had been rude to his mother and refused to apologise, the lawyer explained.

For another charge involving the man hitting his older son with his hands, she explained that it arose as a result of frustration over the boy's "persistent non-compliant behaviour" when reprimanded.

As for caning the younger son, she shared that it was for the boy having acted violently and pushing another child at the playground.

As such, the man felt that "strong corrective action" was needed.

The man's defence lawyer argued that the man's intent was "corrective at all times", and the fact that he reported himself to the police made his case unlike typical abuse cases, CNA reported.

The man also fully accepted that his actions had been excessive, the lawyer said.

According to CNA, the prosecution raised a point about difficulty of detection, which the defence lawyer addressed by saying that the man reported himself to the police before his ex-wife.

This act was a recognition on his part that he had lost control and sought intervention, thereby demonstrating remorse.

The case was adjourned to January as the judge said he needed more time to consider the sentence.

Top image via Canva