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50 insults/retorts only Singaporeans will appreciate

Tuck you, understand?

Jonathan Lim | August 10, 2015 @ 10:59 am

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To celebrate SG50, what better way to mark 50 years of progress than celebrating our creative use of language? It’s 50 years in the making and whether you’re pissed, frustrated or irritated, nothing beats Singlish in laying the smack down on someone.

Here are 50 you can use without having to resort to vanilla vulgarities.

 

1.

wake up your idea1

Usually not a good sign if your boss tells you that.

 

2.

Goondu

We all have one or two special friends like that.

 

3.

pattern more than badminton

The beauty of Singlish. You understand what this means intrinsically without needing an explanation.

 

4.

see you no up

When there is someone you despise intensely.

 

5.

I C U C I C U

ICUCICU

You’ve had an awesome childhood if you know what that means.

 

6.

One quarter fish, three quarters duck

Duck Fish

Another classic from our schooling days. Because the F-bomb was just taboo.

 

7.

Your eyes paste stamp / Bak kiu tak stamp

eye paste stampNo idea how this came about or why people use stamps and not Post-it notes.

 

8.

act cute buay cute acbcOriginal Source

This phrase was coined years ago in preparation for the arrival of Instagram and #selfies.

 

9.

nato

Original Source

Used to describe political parties in The Real Singapore.

 

10. 

cannot make itOriginal Source

Can be used to describe a dish, a person, a situation, or a timing. And they all mean different things.

 

11.

extra

Used on people who are like film extras, but in real life.

 

12.

Gabra

 gabra

Our word for klutz. But gabra sounds more like what it describes.

 

13.

远看朱莉耶, 近看猪八戒

zhu ba jie

For those not proficient in Chinese, direct translation: Look like Juliet from afar, but look like Pigsy up close.

 

14. 

half past six

 

Usually used to describe someone’s work, but also can be used on a person who is generally slipshod or happy-go-lucky.

 

15.

horrigible

Why waste time saying horrible and incorrigible when you can say it in one word?

 

16.

Blob fish. Credit: Science.Discovery.com

When ‘ugly’ just doesn’t cut it.

 

17.

head grow from backside

A local flavoured ‘head in your ass’ rendition isn’t complete without our use of ‘backside’ or ‘backsai’

 

18.

flat like airport runway

Well the ladies can also use this to describe a guy’s crotch. Just saying…

 

19.

Eat full too free

If only you could use it on supervisors suggesting pointless initiatives to look good in front of the boss.

 

20. 

itchy backside

When you see the sign ‘wet paint’ you know your backside will start to itch.

 

21.

cockanadenSome people are just very cock.

 

22.

Cry Mother Cry Father / KPKB

kpkb

We all have that friend who can’t stop yapping.

 

23.

Action Bedek

action bedek

Similar to pattern more than badminton but this can also mean that person likes to talk cock.

 

24.

Basket

Basket

When ‘shit’ and ‘damn’ just doesn’t cut it but ‘bastard’ is just too strong a word.

 

25.

Drama mama

drama mama

 

Continued from here.

 

26.

orbigood

Try not to look like the cat when you say orbigood. You will get punched in the face. You can try flapping your arms like a chicken instead.

 

27.

Kancheong spider

kan cheong spider

Have you seen a spider scuttle across your table? Yes that’s how people look like when they are kancheong.

 

28.

boliao

There is no point. That is the point.

 

29.

cock eye ah you

It’s ok if you’re as cute as the cat.

 

30.

angkat bola

It means carry balls. If you don’t know what it means, maybe it is because you haven’t started working yet.

 

31.

kiasi

Kiasi: Scared of bad things happening to you. Like someone robbing you. Or dying.

 

32.

You’re very Kiasu

kiasu

Kiasu: The intense fear of losing out on good stuff. Or being last to the party.

 

33.

Sabo King

sabo

Trying to do something? You can count on your Sabo King friend to spoil it for you.

 

34.

pao toh king

Did something wrong? You can count on your Pao Toh King colleague to rat on you.

 

35.

Funny king against red curtain

Surfing Facebook? You can count on your Complain King FB friend to fill your feed with rants. Especially against the gahmen.

 

36.

Pangseh King

pangseh king

Turned up early for an appointment? You can count on your Pangseh King friend to cancel on you last minute. Yup, not even sorry.

 

37.

Wayang king

Just enlist? You can count on your Wayang King platoon mate to pretend to be very hardworking in front of the sergeant but actually very expertly leave things like setting up the basha tent to his buddy.

 

38.

He sell backside one

sell backside

Well some people just earned way more money than you think they are capable of. So there’s only one explanation for it.

 

39.

spoil market

There will always someone who has to get 99 roses instead of a normal bouquet. Or do an epic flash mob proposal complete with video crew for YouTube uploading later.

 

40.

fugly

Not just ugly. But fugly.

 

41.

Kanasai

kanna sai

Yes some people or situation looks like it’s been hit by shit. And it is ok to tell them that.

 

42.

wait long long

When long long means never.

 

43.

You go and die lah

go and die lah

Singapore’s version of ‘go to hell’. We use this so it is applicable to friends who have no religion and therefore have no hell to go to.

 

44.

what talking you

I also dunno.

 

45.

jiak kantang

For the ang mo pai or banana.

 

46.

Stir shit / La Sai

stir shit

Some people just want to watch the world burn.

 

47.

kayu

Usually a term reserved for referees.

 

48.

You very loh soh

lor sor

Only can use it on your mother. But not mother-in-law.

 

49.

balik kampong

You could use ‘go home la you’ but the Malay version has better flavour. Just like their food.

 

50.

Stare what stare

stare what stare

 Usually ends up with a lot more insults. But rarely a fight.

 

Don’t want to fight? Want to party instead? Check out these Childhood Party Games made more awesome with alcohol.

Haven’t made any New Year’s Resolutions? We have some easy ones for you.

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About Jonathan Lim

Jon is thankful that Singapore is interesting enough to keep a website like Mothership.sg up and running.

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