AWARE, you better look away now.

One "socially introverted"-turned-dating-coach named Gate from dating school ModernMan Academy wrote a listicle on Jan. 3, titled "7 Types Of Girls You End Up Dating In Singapore!" and posted it on a Facebook page called Just Fun Videos (Singapore Slut).

He probably added the exclamation mark to the article for effect because...

... that's the look on your face when you realised he had the audacity to categorise Singaporean women into seven categories by applying his so-called in-depth knowledge of them:

1. Artsy Fartsy

How he described them:

- Refuses to step into old school kopitiam or hawker centre because “hair will smelly”.

- Talks with angmoh accent, usually sounds fake or try-hard.

We say: We are sure hipsters love old school kopitiam because it's retro.

2. Diva

According to him:

- No car? No (f)luck.

- By the way, no sex either, got car or not. She has her 3 other real lovers on standby for that.

We say: Wait a minute...What's a fluck?

3. Drama Queen

He wrote:

- Watch Captain America cry.

- Read Twilight also cry.

- See Newpaper headline also cry.

- Never Whatsapp her for 30 mins also cry.

We say: Sensitive New Age Guys (SNAG) also cry what.

4. Babytalk 24/7

In his wise words:

- Usually found between ages 25-32. Child-bearing age (or almost over) and bio-clock ticking damn fast.

- Will talk to you and show pics of all her friends getting married and having kids all the damn time.

- If not in a relationship already, she will be out hunting something fierce every weekend.

We say: What's wrong with women having some initiative? We wonder what's something fierce. Tigers?

5. HQ Central

According to the expert:

- Wants to know where you’ve been yesterday, where you going today, what you doing now...

- ...why you went toilet never ask for permission, and also demands that you report HQ every 30 minutes.

We say: Over exaggeration is probably his middle name.

6. The "I-Duno-Leh"

He wrote:

- Everything also “I duno leh.”

We say: We believe many guys don't mind taking the lead?

7. Ah Lian

His damning verdict:

- Every Singaporean guy’s secret fantasy – he wants to do very naughty things to her, simply because her ah-lian image gives him the “rights” to do so.

We say: Oh man. We guess, Ah Bengs reserve the rights to punch you too.

You can avoid his article by not clicking here.

There you have it, Singaporean girls. This is the state of affairs, according to Gate with no surname. He ended with a disclaimer: "Share this if you had a laugh, or have girlfriend(s) who can take a joke."

Ladies, did you get the joke? Because we didn't.

Top photo from ModernMan Academy.

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